2018.

One of the most alarming things for me this year is the rate at which people died; both those who were distant, nearly distant and near. Most times multiple death news in a month, a week, a day!.
An ‘aunty’ who we stayed with (I and my siblings) for sometime and who was very close to the family died of cancer, members of my church..(quiet a number) died by different means, the pastor of the church where I worship in school was sick and died, a few other pastors I know died, a little boy I know (about 7 or 8) also died of cancer, parents of my schoolmates and friends, a few colleagues, so many other people who I met randomly and had 1 or more convo with, many others. So many deaths around Port Harcourt (in Rivers State, Nigeria – the city where I live currently), and all over the world (there was hardly a day without a ‘death’ news headline). Even up until yesterday (I’m not even going to check out for today😔😓). Worst of all, some of them where killed by other people; shot, stabbed, even butchered😭😭. Such gross and grave wickedness. People no longer value human life!

Each time, this got me so overwhelmed, moved to tears (even as I type, I cant control the tears) and really really thinking. I’ve never really been afraid of death, but this year got me seeking consciously what it meant to die; to be alive in a moment and totally out of this world the next moment, to say good bye to the people who love you the most and all the things you struggled to acquire without actually getting a chance to properly do so, to close your eyes and never again open it. At some point I got really scared too. I thought “what is life after all?”, “Why don’t this world just end already?”, “Why do people even die..seemingly mostly ‘good people’?”, “Why do people have to be born at all if they’re going to die so young (as young as few days, 7 years, 16, 17, 18 , 21, 30, you can go on and on)?”.

Well, I got to conclude that life and death belongs to God; He gives and takes and at no time in particular. And even though human beings kill other people, and some times people die out of careless, avoidable situations, God has allowed things. And how long we ‘live’ depends on us. One definition of living is “to make the most of life; to experience a vivid and fulfilled life”. This means not merely ‘existing on this planet’, but living our potential, purpose!.

I figured out that it is really not the length of life that matters (sounds like “oh, no, we all should live long”, I know. Well,…), but the most important thing is that we take each moment we have to be alive and make it useful; for God, for those around us and for ourselves. No one can guarantee his life after this moment. If you’re going to live, make it worthwhile (quit the things that do not matter and begin to make an impact), and if you’re going to die, die at peace; with your maker and with the world. If you’re not yet thinking beyond your cycle and living beyond yourself, I’m afraid you might just be existing and like every other thing, will one day cease to exist. I’m not afraid of death, I’m afraid of living everyday without fulfilling purpose. It takes more than death to kill a man who lives. Take charge of this moment, this moment is your life!

I feel so burdened and very sad when young people chose to live lives that are wild and promiscuous instead of seeking ways to channel youthful vigour to Godly living and fulfilling purpose. This has pained me more. Some might just want to “enjoy life” for sometime, but this moment is all we really have. We only have “today”, “tomorrow” is never guaranteed. This has been the devil’s tactics to destroying individuals, families and nations. (If you know any persons like this – whoever, please don’t stop doing what you can to redirect their focus. Don’t stop praying too. Its not too late.). And if you’re still doubting the existence of God and a life after death, though my heart goes all out for you, I’ve not yet figured out what to say to you (I’m probably too overwhelmed right now). I’d keep praying for you. I promise.

Meanwhile, this year was the most beautiful year I have seen. Very eventful too. One major year. I met people who knew what it meant to live. I learnt. I grew. I lived.

See you next day, next month, next year. Full of life and living.

See you at the peak!💕